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It's funny. I was really surprised at my reaction to Casey's Yankee fandom. It really did feel like a betrayal, in a strange way. So after a while, I just said to her: "Casey, if you're serious about this, if the Yankees really are your favorite team, that's fine. You can have whatever favorites you want. But if you're saying it as a joke, then it feels like you're teasing me, and it really hurts my feelings. You and I have had a lot of fun watching the Mariners together, and you saying that you don't like them anymore makes me sad."
She got that immediately, and there wasn't any drama involved. She just dropped the whole Yankees thing completely.
I feel weird mentioning this, because sports fandom is such a silly, petty thing --- and it's not even my thing, really. I'm so not a passionate sports guy. And clearly she was practicing distinguishing herself from me, in what by any reasonable measure is a pretty innocuous way, so it definitely felt weird to me to squelch that.
But at the same time, something about the dynamic was making me feel bad, and in an ongoing way. (If it'd just been a one-day conceit on her part, it'd have been fine.) And I guess because it clearly was a game for her, I felt like that gave me license to tell her that it wasn't a fun game for me.
I've written before about how she's surprised me when I've asked her for something I felt like I shouldn't be asking for. I haven't made it a habit, and I don't intend to, but there have been two or three times so far that I've come to her for a real favor, and so far she's always come through.
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May 2009 |
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